Fatherhood

It may very well be true that there is a certain degree of social ineptitude on my part when it comes to those in my age bracket, give or take 20 years, but it has also always been true that old people and kids love me.  The irony there is that with older people I am very patient and very kind, but I also tend to relate to them as kids to a certain extent, where kids, I have always found respond better if I treat them, and speak to them, as grown ups, or as grown up as possible.

When I was in college there was a little boy next door, 3 or 4 years old, that was yelled at, disciplined and almost unwanted when he was home.  Then when I was asked to watch him we would do things together, like cooking, or cleaning.  Simple stuff, and not really intense, but I would speak to him as if he were someone I could count on and give him little tasks to do, and we always enjoyed our time together.

I love kids, and I always have.  Even the work I do with youth kids coaching goes well because the kids from 4 to 14 respond very well.  Teaching skiing was the same way.  I was terrified when I first taught skiing of the prospect of teaching kids, not because of the teaching part, but because of the immense responsibility of having six to eight kids to keep alive for two hours.

After I had been teaching for a few years I began to teach kids, everything from the "never evers" and "half pints" to the higher end semi privates for three to six hours of keeping them entertained, safe, warm, and learning, and not only did my students love it, but so did I.

I do not know that I could do the infant stage, as I still to this do have never changed a diaper, a record I would like not to break, but once they are mobile and starting to be a handful, that is the stuff I know I am good at.  I also don't know about having a girl, as I would be very tempted to lock her in a closet, or shoot anyone that looked at her, or both, but I know that what my friends and family have always said is true, I would in fact make a good father.

Problem is, with as incredibly single as I am, and have been for some time, I doubt that Fatherhood is in my future at this point.  Too bad really.  Fatherhood is something that was always in the plan.

Thank you again for getting this far with me.

...Or Is It

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Film at 11:00.

Thank you again for getting this far with me.

Why Not Write

Too much time spent on others combined with too little care about me.

Trying to focus more on what matters to me, but don't know how.

Need to start writing more often just to eat, sleep, breath.

Thank you again for getting this far with me.